What kind of tea you drink
with the queen?
Did you hear about the man who stole a calendar?
He got 12 months.
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?
It was two tired.
What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
I Started A New Business Making Yachts In My Attic This
Year.. Sails Are Through The Roof!
Did You Hear The Story About The Cheese That Saved The
It was legend-dairy!
I'm afraid for the calendar. . . Its days are numbered.
I have kleptomania. Sometimes when it gets really bad, I
take something for it.
The circle is just the most ridiculous shape in the world.
There's absolutely no point to it.
Today, a girl said she recognized me from Vegetarian Club.
But I never met herbivore.
I told my husband I hate my haircut. He replied, 'Donít
worry, itíll grow on you.'
Did you hear that Arnold Schwarzenegger will be doing a
movie about classical music?
He'll be Bach
How do you drown a hipster? In the mainstream.
Why did the coffee file a police report?
It got mugged.