“This isn’t my first rodeo” -Guy at his second rodeo
I could never stab someone, I have a hard enough time getting the straw into a Capri Sun.
Some people say I’m a dreamer, others say, “If you fall asleep at work again you’re fired”
If you want people to know where you stand, wear the same socks for a week
Why do people in Horror Movies yell out “Hello?” as if the killer is gonna say “yeah, I’m in the kitchen, want a sandwich?”